Love yourself. Value yourself. Be good to and for yourself

Why do I keep Venting? On Self Worth

We are told everywhere we go, all we do "let no one dictate your worth." But do we truly know what that means?  And  can we ever escape it?
Self worth has always been a bit of a recurring theme for me. Those readers and friends (and here that may as well be a synonym) who follow this blog have seen me constantly navigating that minefield of identity,  worth and belief. sadly, I come away with the same conclusion most days: the unsettling realisation that all men dictate our worth. Men here may be misconstrued as the male of the species... I do not mean them (or rather us) specifically,  but mankind on a whole.
Now...when you think of yourself,  when you truly consider yourself, what do you picture? For many the mental mirror comes out and we appraise and present our physical self. Eyes that may or may not be aligned with our concept of beauty, a nose that may be too wide or narrow, ears to big/small/pixie like for our faces. We may think of our ill health, of lack of musculature,  of disease and dis - ease. Then slowly if at all we come round to the positives, and we begrudgingly admit our face isn't quite so wonky, our smile a likeable thing, our bodies graceful enough.

Why is it that many of us precede this list of the physical traits with the faulty aspects of our being? Why do we even think of the outside first?

Then there are those who go abstract in their search - abstract here not a term for offense but a lumping term for the intangible aspects of self, such as personality - coming up with traits that define them "I am reflective/peaceful/passionate."

And here we present them first as flaws and not as value free aspects of out makeup.

Everything, even the vocabulary we use to evaluate our worth were things observed and legitimised through collective experience. We define our worth and feelings and experiences on the index of human collective experience and expression.

And here's the thing: we don't get freed from it.

The true sociopaths among us navigate life free from it while manipulating others with the knowledge of it, yes but think of all you have lived as units across the index.

- a sticker for a well done school project
- positive words to a baby on an achieved milestone
- a cheer when an athlete performs spectacularly

Though only one of those instances directly affect fiscal value (itself a whole other system of self valuation and its own Pandora's box), all of them contribute to both our individual sense of worth and the collective appraisal of our worth.

So are we...free?

More time,

Carl.